In the last day or two, I have been thinking a lot about how interesting it is how God works sometimes.  I didn’t really spent any time thinking about “why” when I lost my hearing back in May.  It didn’t matter to me “why.”  It happened and I focused on how to move forward and deal with it.  When I regained some of that hearing, I was thrilled and grateful.  I still didn’t think all that much about “why.”  Lately, I find myself thinking about the “why”…why did I go deaf for a few weeks and then regain some hearing?  Is this where my hearing will stay for a significant amount of time?  Will I lose it again sooner or later?  Will the 12 year pattern change and my hearing be stable from now on?  If so, why did I experience deafness for those weeks?  My questions are not from the perspective of blame or anger like sometimes happens to people, but really just from a wondering perspective.  I accept that it happened, and that it’s God’s decision and plan, not mine.  I’m happy to do my part, whatever that may be.  It’s more of a curiosity.  I’ve been thinking about what that experience has led to in my life….because of those weeks, I’ve become much more sensitive to others who are deaf and hard of hearing.  I’ve had my eyes opened to a whole new world that I never really noticed before.  I’ve started learning ASL, along with many significant others in my life.  I’ve seen a deeper camaraderie and even more interaction among those participating.  We were already close, but it’s drawing us all even closer to each other.   I know of at least one person who has told me that she was touched and encouraged by seeing all of the people taking the sign language class to help support me.  I knew it was touching and encouraging for me, but I didn’t realize it would be for others as well.  I know of at least one person who has mentioned that she is considering becoming a certified ASL interpreter as a career choice – one that would allow her to earn income for her family, but also have the flexibility to stay home with her children.  I wonder if this will eventually lead to a deaf ministry for our church – we have 20 members learning ASL right now. Through the ASL instructor, I’ve been put in contact with many resources I had no idea were available for the deaf and hard of hearing.  She has many connections and has been a wonderful support.  I’ve become more educated about the needs and the technology available to help meet the needs of the deaf and hard of hearing.  I’ve had access to products that will help me adapt and function at a very affordable price.  I’m considering joining the HLAA (Hearing Loss Association of America) and attending meetings to educate myself and be aware of the latest happenings medically, technologically, and politically  and to connect with others that share the same challenges. I’ve become much more aware of being careful and accurate in communication.  I’ve learned that I have to accept that I’m often the one making the mistake in communication, and am learning to listen more carefully, be slower to react until I’ve verified my facts, humble myself more when needed.  I have been talking about writing for years, but this has actually got me started writing. I’ve learned how to set up a blog (!).  There seems to be a cascade of events that have come from those weeks back in May and June and I wonder if that is why it happened.  I also wonder if those weeks of deafness were God  giving me a big nudge to get the things in motion that I have learned about to function better  and regaining some hearing  is His way of allowing me extra time to “get my ducks in a row” before I  lose the rest of my hearing again permanently.  I’m  sure it is easier to learn ASL while I still have some hearing than it would be after it is gone.  Tuesday, I bought the products I need to function at home….a system of alerts that includes an alarm clock that will shake my bed to wake me up and flash strobe lights (I’m unable to hear an alarm clock now), smoke and carbon monoxide detectors that will warn me with strobe lights and an extra loud alarm, a wireless doorbell that will flash a strobe light, and a connection to the phone that will alert me with the strobe light as well (and if I ever babysit grandkids, there’s an alert for a baby monitor, also).  I’m very excited about these items.  I’ll try to get it all up and running in the next few days.  I also got a personal FM assistive listening device that allows me much more flexibility and ability to hear in group situations….I tried it out on Wednesday night at church and was able to hearing people making prayer requests in the audience for the first time in years! I also used it at our ladies class last night and was able to hear the teacher and all comments in that situation!  I’m looking forward to using it at the next flock group.  It’s going to be a wonderful addition to my “tool belt” for me!  These are all items that will also benefit me if/when I lose more hearing and even if I end up with cochlear implants at some point.  Maybe that’s the “why” of how this all happened….I wonder if God is helping ease the transition for me by allowing me to get all of this in place and then when/if the day comes that I’m permanently deaf (and making decisions about cochlear implants) these things will already be done and working and I will already be accustomed to them and comfortable with them.  I know it will make the transition that much smoother and less overwhelming.  Ultimately, I don’t know the reasons and I may never know.  I find it interesting to see all of the events that have taken place as a result of it all, and all of the blessings.  They would not have happened if this situation had not occurred.  I’ll be looking forward to “the rest of the story” and seeing what all of this leads to.  I’m thankful we have a God who is always in control and who has plans for us that are so much better than we could ever imagine on our own.  I’m excited about whatever the future holds for me!